Jon Scieszka - Time Warp Trio 05 by 2095
Author:2095
Language: eng
Format: mobi, epub
Published: 2012-06-25T22:31:50+00:00
SEVEN
I heard the crowd, felt someone unwrap us, heard Sam moan, “I’m too young to die.”
Fred, Sam, and I spilled out of the Squishy Soft wrapping. We were right in the middle of a small stage. And the entire crowd was staring at us, pointing, laughing, and clapping.
“Presto chango alakazam, “ boomed a voice be hind us, And the minute I heard that voice, I knew who it was.
“Uncle Joe! “
“We’re saved,” said Sam.
Uncle Joe looked at me, the crowd, then back at me. “Joe? You’re not a rabbit.”
“No,” I said. “At least I don’t think I am. “Uncle Joe looked over at Sam and Fred. “And they’re not doves.“
Sam and Fred shook their heads no.
Uncle Joe looked in his top hat. “I can never get that trick to work quite right.”
Someone yelled, “On with the show.”
“You’ve got to hide us, quick,” I said. “The time police are chasing us.”
Uncle Joe twirled his moustache. Then he wrapped the three of us in Squishy Soft.
“Ladies and gentleman, believers and friends. For my final feat of prestidigitation, I will need your undivided attention. With your help, I will send these three wrapped lads into the warp of Time and Space, never to be seen again.”
Sam wiggled next to me. “Is he serious?”
“No, “ I said. “He can’t do that. He’ll probably drop us through a trapdoor in the stage.”
“I’ll need three volunteers,” said Uncle Joe. “Ah yes. You three young ladies in the back.”
I had a slight sinking feeling. I peeked through a hole in our Squishy Soft wrapping.
“Oh no,” I said. “Guess who he picked?”
“The killer girls,” said Fred.
“What do we do?” squeaked Sam.
“Stay calm,” I said. “Maybe Uncle Joe’s trick will work and they won’t spot us. “
“And maybe an elephant with wings will fly out of my nose,” said Sam.
“The human mind is a powerful instrument, “ boomed Uncle Joe. “Imagine how powerful a group of minds could be. With the help of these three young ladies, we will join minds and disintegrate this … toilet paper! “
“I don’t feel so good,” whispered Sam.
“Our first volunteer will chant ‘Ee-Nee.’ The sec ond will chant ‘Me-Nee.’ The third will chant ‘My Nee.’ Then everyone join in to chant ‘Mo.’ As soon as we have merged our thoughts, I will flush the toi let paper into Time and Space.”
Someone in the crowd yelled, “Why don’t you use a toilet transporter?”
“I work by brain power alone,” said Uncle Joe. Then he pointed to the first girl.
She said, “Ee-Nee.” He pointed to the second girl. She said, “Me-Nee.” The third girl.
She said, “My-Nee.” The crowd shouted, “Mo!”
“EeNee.”
“MeNee.“
“MyNee.”
“Mo!”
“Ee-Nee-Me-Nee-My-Nee-Mo!”
“EeNeeMeNeeMyNeeMo!“
Uncle Joe raised both arms. There was a flash of light, a crash, and a huge white puff of smoke.
“Ladies and gentlemen, where there once were three boys, I give you—”
A blast of wind from a passing bus pod blew the smoke away and revealed … Fred, Sam, and me. The only thing that had disappeared was our Squishy Soft disguise.
One of the girls called, “There they are.
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